This is a collaborative post by Ellie Jo with relationship advice.
image source: https://www.pexels.com/photo/white-and-brown-flower-petals-4439465/
We have all made mistakes, and when we hurt someone, it can usually be very difficult to admit it and say “sorry.” No matter who it is, it can be difficult to redeem ourselves in the eyes of this person or people. So we have to remember how to apologize and make amends when we have hurt someone through our actions.
How to Apologize
Genuine Remorse
When we do something that is far beyond what we comprehend, it can spiral out of control and truly impact our lives. The most obvious example is committing a crime. Sometimes we can do things in the spur of the moment or think that we are doing it for a good reason.
And of course, there is the parable about the starving family and the man who steals a loaf of bread to feed them, but when we’ve done something and there can seem to be no way back, you’ve got to have help on your side. While there are criminal defense attorneys you can rely on in this sort of environment, it’s crucial to remember that the punishment fits the crime. If we’ve done something really bad and we want to show someone that we are truly sorry, we’ve got to be heartfelt, simple, and genuinely show remorse. This is what separates us from the hardened criminals in the world.
Showing Someone How You’ve Learned
It seems that we live in an age where many people do not like to show the errors of their ways. But when we’ve made a mistake, we need to show the person that we’ve hurt how we’ve truly made leaps in what we’ve learned. By showing someone that we are going to simplify our life, and take actions to ensure that what we do will never happen again is one thing.
But we have to remember that, in order to truly show someone how we learn from our mistakes, we need to see it from their perspective as well. This is part of how addicts truly come to terms with what they’ve done. When we are consumed by our wants and needs, this leaves little room for empathy.
Asking For Forgiveness
Forgiveness is a double-edged sword. If you ask someone to forgive you, you had better show them that you are truly repentant. Many people ask for forgiveness as a get out of jail free card. Because they cannot bear the feeling of someone not liking them that they ask for forgiveness so they feel reassured. Asking for forgiveness is about earning it.
It may not happen overnight. It may take months, or even years. But asking for forgiveness is about showing that you deserve it through your actions.
Whether we need to show someone we have learned our lesson, display remorse, or ask for forgiveness, learning to make amends after a mistake is about what we have learned. If we haven’t learned anything, how can we expect anybody to trust us? This is something that we all go through in life and it is a key part of healing and growing.
