Phone Call Stress – Awaiting Test Results After a Cancer Diagnosis

This is a refreshed post from years ago.

If you have ever had serious health issues, you know how tough it is to wait for test results. For me, I have anxiety before, during, and after the test. Every time the phone rings my heart rate doubles.

The sight of my doctors name on the caller ID almost causes a heart attack. You may think I’m exaggerating, but really I’m not.

It all goes back to my first biopsy. After feeling a lump in my breast many doctors reassured me it was just a cyst. When I went to get the “cyst” drained, it wouldn’t drain and was no longer considered a cyst.

The next day, I saw the doctor’s name on the caller id. Not a good sign. All I remember hearing is, “The biopsy shows abnormal cell growth.” And, “Yes, you have breast cancer.”

I get anxiety after every medical test I have now.

Last week, I had a colposcopy after a pap from a few months ago came back “slightly abnormal”. I was nervous a week before the test.

During the test my legs were shaking so badly I’m surprised the doctor could even complete the exam.

Friday, I was nervous every time the phone would ring. Yesterday, I was so stressed I took a Xanax during the middle of the day to calm me down. I think the last time I took one was maybe a year ago.

Today around 10am the phone rang and the caller id displayed my doctor’s name. I almost couldn’t breathe. Two days after a biopsy and the doctor is calling?

Luckily, my doctor got straight to the point. No small talk. The test came back normal. Nothing showed up in the biopsy. I thought for a minute I might collapse.

Have you ever had an extremely stressful event or emergency and then when it’s all over you feel wiped out? You probably know how I felt then.

I know I should be relaxed now, but I still feel like I’m coming down from that adrenaline high. It might take some time. The last week has been extremely stressful awaiting the test and the results.